Ideas for a Paris themed bedroom

When my youngest daughter turned nine last year, the only thing she wanted was to redecorate her bedroom. After several months of bugging me and begging, I gave in. I think it’s important for a child to have their own space that they feel comfortable in. I also think it’s important that they are involved in the selection process and the work, so they have ownership of it! Being thoroughly girly girl, she chose Paris as her theme. However, she doesn’t like pink and chose blue instead. That caused a moment’s hesitation because when you google “Paris Bedroom” you find tons and tons of pink and black ideas, but very few blue ones. We researched ideas together and came up with a bedroom we were both thrilled with for under $200. I must tell you that I could have done it cheaper. We already had black chalkboard paint, which I used to paint the knobs on her dresser to give it a different look. I could have used that same black paint to create the designs on her walls myself and saved the $40, but I was working three jobs at the time and opted to splurge on vinyl stickers from amazon…huge time saver that was worth every penny!

Because she chose the black and white bedding set that came with decorative pillows, $55 from Walmart.com, the walls had to really pop! We went to Home Depot and browsed tons of color samples, and she chose her favorite. We didn’t skimp on the paint because I really wanted the walls to have impact and look great! We went with Behr Marquise interior egg-shell stain blocker paint & primer, in Beachside Drive blue. One gallon was about $50, but it covered beautifully with one coat and we had tons left over. I bought white curtains ($9.99) and black valances ($7.99) from Amazon, as well as the vinyl Paris wall stickers: all for about $60. She chose artwork, canvas wall decor and a few decorative accents from Hobby Lobby, where we spent about $30, and we bought a simple black rug from Walmart for about $20. The perfume bottles were $.50 cents each at a local thrift store. I printed labels myself and added food coloring to the water. Skylar really got involved with this project, and painted all the lower half of the walls herself. I was impressed with the effort she put into it, and happy with her sense of satisfaction and ownership when it was finished. I offered to paint her bed as well, which I could have done with the black paint, but she decided to leave it natural.

Unfortunately, she only kept her new room clean for a couple of weeks before she went back to her old ways of stringing dirty clothes all across the floor!

Why I said "NO!" to competitive dance for my daughter

Skylar started dancing with a local company a year ago. She absolutely loves it, lives for it. The child dances 98% of her day. She is more likely to kick you in the face practicing a dance pose or stretch than look you in the eye. She moves constantly, even during movie time, she literally can’t sit still. She is also very good. Naturally talented and graceful. I like to say that I “knew since she could walk she was a dancer…” and it’s actually true. Of course, you never know if your vision for your children will match their own, but I certainly saw the grace and form in her to be amazing. And I was right, she is! I have invested allot of time lately considering allowing her to move into competitive dance, and comparing the cost between dance as we know it and competitive dance. Right now she has one regular class per week, and stays after for 45 minutes of acro. As you can imagine given her love of constant movement, she really loves acro. My initial comparison figures were apx. $1,250 we pay now (by the skin of our friggin teeth I might add) vs $2,400 for competition, taking into consideration additional costume fees, Company fees and competition fees. That’s a big leap in price and does not include private lesson fees of $30 per lesson if she is chosen for special dances (which is completely determined by the Company, including lesson schedule and frequency), travel expenses to the competitions, or account for my time off on the Fridays of those weekends….or the necessary commitment of my time in general to do all this. I felt confident that my calculations were a thorough enough assessment of the costs involved. However, after I worked those basic numbers I read a long informative blog post from a seasoned “dance Mom” regarding the expense, specifically all the ones that you don’t know are coming until you’ve experienced that life…crazy! Her daughter’s first year of competitive dance cost $8,500 (her basic tuition costs were higher though, by about $1,000) and her kid only had 2 dances in the competitions! Each dance costs an entry fee, which I was estimating would be apx $165 bottom end (assuming she would be chosen for 3 group dances only, trios are double the price and solos are 3 times the price), but for this lady and her kid it was more like $250. Much of that total cost for her was one trip to a competition that fell on 4th of July weekend, due to inflated hotel expenses and the like the travel expenses were $3,000…again, my figure above does not include those expenses because I don’t yet know what they will be. I was fully prepared to let Skylar wow our Dad’s with her skills at the recital, which I cannot deny she has in spades, then hand them a copy of my cost estimate with a “since you think I should let her do this, we are gladly excepting donations” speech…but after much thought and deliberation, I’ve decided not to allow her to compete, but that decision has very little to do with the cost. To begin with, I want her to love dance long term. I just know in my heart she is meant to do this. I don’t want to push her at such a young age, or allow others too, past the point of enjoying it. I want her to continue dancing, but also focus on academics. I want her to have time for homework, which is a struggle on the one night a week she dances now. Kids need sleep, and in order for her to have a decent bedtime and get plenty of rest, she must get her homework done early…she can’t do that on dance days. On a normal day she is home by 4 p.m. and has time to wind down and play a little before sitting down with her homework before dinner. On dance days she doesn’t get home until 7 p.m. or later…past play time, homework time and even our normal dinner time! I have no doubt that she COULD do it, but I think its important for her to keep those grades up without so much of a struggle. Not to mention enjoying just being a kid, with normal playtime building forts and getting dirty. I also want her to have other experiences, such as volleyball or soccer. Maybe even cheer leading, which is similar to dance but she wouldn’t have time for both. After much research, I’ve concluded that a childhood career in competitive dance may be beneficial in terms of simple experience and practice, but the competition aspect will not give her an advantage whatsoever toward a future as professional dancer. If she is decides to attend an actual dance school or college, she will be judged on her audition and current abilities regardless of her background. I find it extremely hard not to want to show her off, allow her to shine in competition as my chest swells with pride. It’s hard to ignore comments like “she is so good, you have to let her compete…” But I prefer for her to love it and learn slowly, building her skills in preparation for a real future…maybe even Julliard, because yes, she is that good. Or she will be.

Fitness Goals?

I gained around 70 lbs with both of my pregnancies. After the first, I was very motivated to lose the baby weight and get back into my cute little shorts. I did exactly that, but my reasoning was more about keeping my husband happy then myself. After the second child was born I was less concerned with his opinion and not as motivated to lose the weight. Although I have sort of tried a few times, I’m still carrying it around today, and she will be 10 next week! In light of my new exuberance for life, and desire to start dancing and being more active, I think I should finally set some fitness goals.

Once upon a time I loved to walk every day. When I was still married, he was there with the kids and I was free to meet my friend at the park at 5 a.m. for a pre-dawn stroll. I loved that time with her (btw, I miss you Erin!) and felt very proud of the 2-3 miles we walked every morning.

Life happened, divorce happened, and I couldn’t leave my then 3 and 6 year old daughters home alone while I cavorted around the park at ungodly hours of the morning. So my fitness routine bit the dust.

At one point I joined a “Biggest Mover” competition at the local YMCA. My friends and I formed a team, paid our dues and bought the bright pink matching t-shirts. I seriously dreaded it, and only agreed because my best friend REALLY wanted to do it. Much to my surprise, I really enjoyed it! I was doing everything I was suppose to, and began to see results. Sadly, my teammates did not enjoy it as much as I did, were extremely busy and consequently did not put as much effort into it. Our coach, obviously not a sensitive soul, suggested my teammates were holding me back from success. I was mortified! My motivation had very little to do with “winning” the team weigh-ins and everything to do with supporting each other, and I knew that thoughtless comment would have the opposite effect. As expected, my friend’s embarrassment and insult brought the entire project to a halt and none of us finished the competition. I also participated in the Color Run one year, alone because I couldn’t convince anyone to do it with me! I had every intention of training for it weeks or months ahead of time, but I never did train as I should have. It’s hard to motivate yourself without a partner. When the day arrived, I showed up, totally out of shape, and walked the entire thing rather than running it. But I was so proud that I did it! I collapsed at the finish line exhausted, red faced and tie-dyed, but oh so happy! I even posted the awful photos to social media, sharing with the world my embarrassing moments of dingy delight.

As a waitress at a busy cafe, you would think I got plenty of exercise. My faithful pedometer said I walked 26,000 steps per shift, on average. Unfortunately, I think I ate enough to counter-act all those steps because I found myself gaining weight!

Now that I have my wonderful new office job, I don’t get all those steps…or any steps really. On top of that I’m trying to quit smoking, which leaves me wanting to put something in my mouth ALL DAY LONG. Not a good combination in terms of my future success as a dancing queen.

So I find myself in need of some goals. But to be fair, my life is more than a little full right now, with the kids out of school for the summer and all these exciting new things I’m doing and writing about.

I have to start somewhere, though. I know I will enjoy it once I find the motivation to begin. Since I am a firm believer in baby steps, I think a good starting goal is to just make it to the gym. I’ll keep you posted if I make that goal and am ready to step it up a bit!